This DonateLife Week, a grieving sister shares how her family turned Destiny’s tragedy into a life-saving legacy. It’s a powerful reminder to consider organ donation and discuss your wishes with loved ones.
“Destiny was a typical 22-year-old,” says her sister Belinda Cowling. “She was fun, bubbly. She had a good sense of humour. She was a disability support worker.” But Destiny’s life was tragically cut short by a seizure in April. In the midst of grief, Belinda and her family made the brave decision to donate Destiny’s organs, a choice that saved two lives.
A sister’s intuition
“I actually asked the question before the question got asked,” says Belinda. “I knew that Destiny was a healthy young girl. When we found out that she wasn’t going to make it because she was brain dead, I spoke to her doctor about donating her organs.”
That night, Belinda approached her mother about organ donation. Though initially hesitant, her mother soon understood the importance of this decision.
“I told her ‘We’ve been by her bed for days now, hoping and praying that Destiny would be okay but she’s not. We’re at the end now, and she could save other people’s lives’.”
Support through the process
The family found comfort in the support provided by DonateLife SA. Belinda describes its staff as “lovely” and says they “went above and beyond” to help her family through the process.
“They explained in depth what organs were being donated and just explained everything to us about organ donation,” she says. “They were amazing.”
A touching letter
Recently, the family received a heartwarming letter from one of the organ recipients. “It was so genuine and made such a difference,” says Belinda. The anonymous recipient expressed eternal gratitude to Destiny and pledged to honour her memory each year on the anniversary of her passing.
“It just made it so much more real for us,” Belinda says. “He said in the letter he’d hoped and prayed that he’d get a miracle, and it turned out that his miracle was Destiny. It definitely makes it better, and we really know we made the right decision to donate Destiny’s organs.”
Finding meaning in loss
Despite the tragedy of losing her “beautiful, loving” little sister, Belinda finds solace in knowing that Destiny’s gift saved lives. “It turned out the best that it could – she’s definitely in a better place, and she saved two people’s lives,” she says.
Belinda urges everyone to register as an organ donor and inform their families of their decision. “You never know what tomorrow holds,” she says.
The gap between intention and action
“When you survey South Australians on a street corner, eight out of 10 are happy to help others by becoming organ donors,” says Dr Stewart Moodie, Medical Director of DonateLife SA. “However, only half of families have the presence of mind to think about helping others through organ donation when it comes down to the moment of truth in hospital.”
The power of communication
Dr. Moodie stresses the importance of not only registering as an organ donor but also discussing this decision with family members. “The best way to do this is by talking to them about it and saying, ‘Look, after I’m gone, if I’m in a position to help others, I’d like to do that’,” he says.
“This makes a huge difference. Around eight in 10 families say yes to donation if their family member is registered or discussed it with them. This drops to only four in 10 if their family didn’t know they wanted to be a donor.”
A legacy of generosity
Organ donation is not just about saving lives – it’s about leaving a legacy of kindness and compassion. “I think leaving a legacy where you’ve helped other unknown people, is such an amazing act – it really represents the best of who we are,” says Dr Moodie.
Take action today
There are currently around 1,800 Australians on the waitlist for an organ transplant, and many more could benefit from a life-changing donation. By registering as an organ donor and discussing your decision with your family, you could be the miracle someone is waiting for.
Anyone in Australia aged 16 and over can register on the Australian Organ Donor Register – it only takes a minute.
Find out more about organ donation and DonateLife Week here.
